Evaluating Men For Alliances & Marriage Series #18: Get Your Sexy On!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BSUGgdhcFsE

Lois and Clark getting a little friendlier…..

It’s been a minute or two since I’ve added a new installment to this series, but this was an opportune moment. In other words, I really needed to have something to say! While posts at the main site vary in frequency, you can always find daily conversation at Twitter or Facebook.

Despite some of the more recent upsetting current events, we must keep moving forward. I say this as much for myself as for all of you, that we have to find a way past obstacles and see the best outcomes for ourselves. That’s not easy.

So, after reminding women to be women and stop feeling obligated to be good little soldiers lined up on the battlefields only to be knocked down, reacquaint yourself with your va-va-voom. And you can’t get your sexy on while feeling or being under siege.

Repeat after me: Men Must Rescue Themselves.

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Would You Pay $3000 To Learn How To Marry Into Wealth?

Sorry gents, this is strictly for the ladies! Beijing’s Moral Education Centre for Women offers a 30-hour course in life skills and ways for marriage-focused women to appeal to men of means.

Instructors advise going to places that the rich frequent, such as fancy bars and private clubs, learning proper restaurant and dining etiquette, studying formal dress, staying indifferent when presented with luxury gifts and avoiding insincere flattery.

Some of this advice is universally sound. It could work for anyone who wants to expand their social circles. I can see where some people would twist the idea of positioning and expediency and make it into a calculated, self-serving venture. Who gives a ____!!

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TRUST IN GOD & (WO)MAN

Gosh – this song still rocks! David Bowie’s Modern Love.

This 80’s classic is a song about being confident about love. Yes, despite the protagonist’s declaration of not “believing” in it, he still yields to Modern Love. I wonder if it’s biographical because that song was released before David Bowie met and married Iman.

So even the most cynical of us, who may allow fear to taint our perspective when presented with a choice will take a chance at fulfilling their heart’s desires.

Our desires are just as much a part of us as our skin tone or eye color. The ones that are attuned to our spirit are meant to be fulfilled. Otherwise we wouldn’t be innately drawn to them. We can block our own blessings by ignoring the path laid out before us in exploring what those desires are and how to achieve them.

That’s why the conversations centered at this forum are about maximizing the quality of your life in all areas. It’s a 360 degree LIFE(SYTLE)/DESIGN.

If you’re hiding out in “chuuch” not getting your “Love Boat” in order, YOU are causing those desires to remain unfulfilled. Your indecision is the block getting in the way of living with vitality. If you think you can behave indiscreetly or indiscriminately and not pay a price for it, you’re not being realistic.

We have to measure the pros and cons of everything we do.

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AOFB Mid-Year Review

It’s already June! I was going to write a quarterly review in April. 30 posts later, I guess I missed the boat! Busy. Busy. Busy.

This was going to be a more extensive post….but I realized some of the things I wanted to talk about: namely weight and self-esteem and being realistic deserves its own separate post. Then, I realized I have already discussed many of these points before, so this might be yet another angle to an ongoing conversation…or beating a dead horse.

I suppose the lurkers who de-cloak from the Romulan Bird-Of-Prey to comment will decide if it’s protest-worthy.

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Evaluating Men For Alliances & Marriage Series #9: The Adventures Of Man-Children

Oh boy! Here’s to hoping most of you ladies identify and quickly discard the enfante terribles, but I’m still not decided on whether they are deeply harmful or a part of the dating foibles women may run into. I suppose it depends on how deeply you get caught up.

Your successful navigation away from grown males with grammar school mentalities does come from standard checklists and time, but often we are in the middle of exercising all of our freedoms as modern women and may not realize we’re in a version of Never Never Land until it’s too late.

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BWE Infiltrators & Posers Round Two: Black Woman-Haters Are Now Speaking On Our Behalf?!

I am sooo loathe to mention this DBR fool’s name, so I’ll link to one of my earlier posts that analyzed his denigration of our First Lady, Michelle Obama instead. Having just re-read it, I must say it was brilliant. One of my best posts and that was the summer when DBR-ville and the reality of the dead black community really impacted me. Despite my acerbic wit, I was not pleased at facing these facts.

The work began in earnest from that point on. It’s success has meant the flood of infiltrators and traitors is real as well. Funny, how his leap from black woman vomit-spewing hatred, to fake defending us has happened in less than two years. He’s trying to stay relevant ya’ll but he gets no free press at my forum!

I’d heard he was on cable news speaking out against the (Psycho)logy Today article and I had to take a deep breath! This is part of the attack on the validity of the BWE [Black Women’s Empowerment/Liberation Theory] message as a legitimate social justice movement. He has zero credibility and is an opportunist!

This is a loosely active method of infiltration, appropriation and bogarting that’s happening due to the success of deploying the BWE message. For those who’ve been reading this forum for a length of time you’ll recall when I had to publicly respond to a black woman blogger who had behaved in inappropriate ways behind the scenes, played chicken with a core-BWE blogger, deleted her post and then tried to play dumb about the entire incident. I didn’t mention her by name — ya’ll did!

As I stated then and I’ll restate it now it has always been about the MESSAGE not glory for any one blogger. That’s the only thing that has kept these efforts legit. If you readers, fence-sitters, naysayers, opportunists and diluters want to poison the well that is on YOU. My efforts have been consistent and transparent — and sincere.  I have shaken off the chains of indoctrination, found my ethnic pride and reclaimed my right to be a woman. I don’t know what the rest of you are doing, but I’ve moved on! I hope you are as well.

Anyone can set aside several hours (ok days) and go back 2-3 years and read the history of who laid the groundwork, the obstacles that had to be addressed, the people that came along for the ride for a little while, the ones who tried to change the message, those that fought us tooth and nail, the slime tactics they engaged in, a few public situations some of us found ourselves involved in, the breaking-off point where we who set standards had to part with others who had different agendas, the way those others tend to be bitter angry and defensive about it instead of living their lives TO THIS DAY and finally the crop of women who decided to jump on the bandwagon and claim to be one of us without doing the work or being a reliable ally, the ones who’ve little by little backslid into mediocrity and those who still question what we do, how we do it and why.

Alongside the outsiders who are spectators and who take bits of pieces of this mission for their own forums.  There are some who have heaved a sigh of relief at reading how a few of us have our heads screwed on straight as they’ve been wondering what’s wrong with us for putting up with such crappy behavior and mistreatment. Now you know! So this is where we stand today. More or less. I still observe the mass lack of discernment and compromise going on, but I can’t do anything about that. Those are YOUR standards, not mine.  Oh and as someone who has taken my fair share of direct hits, I do have a right to speak on this and stake my claim as a BWE messenger UNDILUTED!

Anyway, back to the Court Jester. This would be the same fool that said the black women who were raped by white slave-masters somehow benefited from the abuse. Oh wait! He later claimed his “cousin” got hold of his cell phone while he was in a yoga class and sent those vile, messages via Twitter. Then like a slimy weasel, deleted them. You can read the coverage at What About Our Daughters for more details. Here. Here and…Here.

So where is this cousin? I want proof!

The editors at the New York Times who allowed that Michelle Obama as “ghetto girl” article to be published should’ve been laughed out of the newsroom. Any serious journalist worth their salt would never allow an “anonymous” source to be used in such a fashion. Yet, journalistic standards are long a thing of the past, eh? I’m reminded of a conversation between Joe Konrath and Barry Eisler where they discussed the failing standards during a larger conversation about the publishing industry. It only emphasized how far that ship has sailed and how low the standards have sunk. Wait — there aren’t any left!

Eisler said and I concur:

“One of the most destructive, pernicious, slovenly aspects of modern journalism is the promiscuous use of anonymous quotes. Most news consumers are so inured to references to anonymous sources that they don’t even notice them. And though newspapers like the New York Times and Washington Post have strict rules about the use of anonymous sources, they routinely ignore them–ignore their own rules.

Here’s the thing. The only time a journalist is justified in using an anonymous source for a quote is when that source is a whistle-blower or otherwise faces a legitimate fear of retaliation if her or his identity is revealed. That’s it. That’s the only circumstance.”

Not when idiots run amuck! I’m not interested in being “outraged”. I want accountability. I want all of you to take notice of how some people are going to start jumping on this bandwagon because they presume a gravy train could be headed their way.

They do not give a rat’s *** about black women. They still hate us! They will grin in our faces with a knife at the ready. Do NOT fall for the okey doke! Look at the total history and their dealings with a variety of women. Look at how they’ve behaved towards the keepers of the BWE message as opposed to everybody else, including the “safe” black women. There is a difference. Unless they’ve been vetted, tested and approved and re-checked for consistency they are NOT TO BE TRUSTED.

********

At the end of the day, though I want you all to be aware of what’s going on behind the scenes so you’re not caught off-guard we must keep moving forward. In a different thread about a similar conversation reader Tracy made a very important observation which I’ve excerpted here:

“If you keep hang dogging about what the least powerful men on the planet are doing and saying instead of concentrating on your bliss, then you will never move on, no matter who you are with. Nignore, let them go….”

 

*I may not get to your comments until the weekend, but please discuss amongst yourselves until I reply.

Psycho-Babble Today Sez They’re Sorry. So What!

I ignored jumping too deeply into the feeding frenzy that resulted from the poison arrow lobbed at black women by the quack scientist and once-esteemed rag Psycho(logy) Today. They aimed..and missed! “We apologize…” so says, Editor-In-Chief Kaja Perina. Don’t you just feel the remorse? Nope? Me either! Well..this isn’t an Anita Baker song, so now you get the wrath and it’s time to pay the piper.

The reason why I tend to not spend more than a few minutes on reacting, protesting and being angry over such blatant and obvious attacks on black women is because those that engage in them often have a larger agenda at hand. Not to mention the fact that there are so many these days, it’s hard to keep one separate from the other. We have made huge inroads using the Interwebs to spread a message of empowerment and support that has been noticed. Hence the doubled efforts at defaming us. In this instance, people got worked up, petitions were signed, phone calls were made and that’s a good thing when compared to the utter silence that used to occur.

Now what?

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Evaluating Men For Alliances & Marriage Series #8: The Curious Case Of A Real-Life “Good Wife” Maria Shriver

Ah…so many lessons can be learned by studying the choices of others – particularly women of privilege who are purported to “have it all”.

A story loosely based on the Schwarzenegger marriage may likely be a Lifetime Movie Of The Week that will air this Fall. I’d bet money on it! Hey ya’ll, just a few thoughts are going to be dispensed rapid-fire style so saddle up! The public revelation of the long-term infidelity and betrayal of Arnold Schwarzenegger that has finally culminated in the break-up of his marriage to Maria Shriver should not have come as a surprise to anyone paying attention. If you lived in California during the time of his and the Republican’s “Total Recall” election sham that ousted Governor Gray Davis you would have noted the allegations of his long-history of cheating and sexual aggression enacted against other women.

I applaud those who managed to keep this bombshell a secret FOR TEN YEARS though {HOW!!!} – he never would’ve been elected had the public gotten wind of it!! I know Newt Gingrich is planning a run for the White House and I laugh! If some people want to vote for a serial cheater who has been married multiple times and abandoned his former wives when ill – while espousing family values, I’ll call a FOOL a FOOL. From a political standpoint the Ah-nuld debacle is even more frightening than most have still processed because some of those political yahoos were talking about amending the Constitution to allow a foreign-origin President – him! Those are some powerful allies at work who wanted to deploy a Trojan Horse scenario. Look at the condition of California post- Ah-nuld. Not all of it has to do with the economy, but of course many aspects that have damaged this country are a direct result of policies enacted by (and in collusion with Democrats) Republicans.

WE DODGED A MAJOR BULLET!!!!

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How Serious Are You About Uplifting Black Women?

We interrupt this regularly scheduled blog post to take a moment to ask a serious question:

Are you really in support of black women?

ALL black women – including acknowledging the contributions of African-American women that pretty much everyone else benefits from and appropriates the Civil Rights model those women perfected for your group’s personal use?

Some may have wondered why I chose to post “lighter” fare the past few weeks. Well…of course if you are a discerning reader you already know subtle doesn’t equal lack of depth and adapting new mentalities can be employed in a variety of ways. Besides, I’m getting rather fed up at the poseurs and voyeurs who are mere passengers seeking an amusement ride.

Let me speak plainly now:

All the faux (or real) outrage in the world will disappear into the ether without a well-supported infrastructure.

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abundance is where women who don’t want to wallow in powerlessness go to create a better life

I’m having a poetic epiphany!

Between Questlove, Russell Simmons, Ashley Judd and now Lisa Price of Carol’s Daughter ganging up on black women, denying our heritage, telling us the only blacks are men and all the women are white, it seems the usual denigration has been kicked up a notch while they’re kicking us in the teeth.

You do realize this means we are “winning”, right?

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