Revisiting Sharon P. Carson’s Original Book “Act Like A Lady Think Like A Man”

I was in a Facebook forum on women utilizing relationship techniques where someone posted a video clip from a comedian’s talk show. If you’re familiar with the title of her book, then you know who ripped it off. Perhaps you weren’t around when we first highlighted this situation of intellectual property theft back in 2009 and didn’t realize it was the dirt that occurred. I was compelled to bring these mostly non-black women up to speed on who they were even remotely legitimizing in error. I took a breath and quickly filled them in.

Since that opportunist was mentioned I had to revisit the site of the original creator of such an affirming book written with love for women to better themselves. I’m relieved to hear author Sharon P. Carson’s copyright case against him is still active and I hope she wins millions. In the meantime, I really appreciate her attitude of trust that everything will work out to her benefit in the end. May it be so.

Women need to remember ONE thing:

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Despite The Blatant “Open Season” Disrespect, Many Black Women ARE Setting Boundaries!

Did I catch the long tail of anti-black woman gendered racism from non-blacks reaching its peak? Or is there an increased awareness due to the extended social justice efforts of BWE that the lifestyle changes have spurred an even bigger cultural shift than we’ve realized?

Between recent coverage of Majora Carter, Dr. Dambisa Moyo oh and the pushback against the ongoing everyday assault on black women within the dead black community aka Blackistan, we’re witnessing an unprecedented number of attacks…but are they more likely to be recognized with more countermeasures in place?

The aggression may still occur, but it is not business as usual! The discrepancy between those demanding back women do this, cater to that, respond with “x” and serve their purposes without respect or reciprocity are over.

Continue reading “Despite The Blatant “Open Season” Disrespect, Many Black Women ARE Setting Boundaries!”

Here’s A Few Curated Tumblr Blogs Giving Kudos To Black Women

Tumblr users tend to use lots of gifs, animated media freeze-framed into clips. Someone will get a movie clip and write the dialogue or get a moveable screen-shot of a reaction and loop it. They’re using imagery, not just commentary to get the message across. It’s good to have both. I don’t recall these blogs in existence two years ago.

As further evidence of the lasting success of authentic empowerment, I’ve observed an explosion of sites dedicated to healthy representation of relationships, advocacy with the necessary internal transformative work being discussed, tributes to darker-complexioned black women, fun travel sites, health & fitness, beautiful photo sites, fashion and a peek into different cultures.

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Reciprocity 101

True empowerment requires a commitment to self, authenticity and being responsible for the people, places and practices you support. No one does anything for you that you won’t do for yourself. Don’t leave the heavy lifting only to others in situations where you’ve benefited from the actions of others. Don’t keep vital information to yourself.

Correctly identifying allies and opportunities is key.

In case you want to trip down memory lane, watch Miss Jackson after the jump.

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Deathstyles by Blackistan & Incorrect BWE Messaging

The Battle Has Been Won: Now You Have To Live Within & Help Expand This New Power Dynamic

As always, keep your wits about you. I had to ask myself if I really wanted to have another conversation related to Black Women’s Empowerment (BWE) messaging. It’s not for lack of want for success in the lives of countless women, but I have to ask whether most women are moving forward or circling the same issues repeatedly and why that is so appealing. So consider this another Maintenance Report. As we are in the era of post-BWE success, do we need regular reminders of what BWE is and is not to drive home the accurate message of self-actualization?

Is looking back the best method for determining progress? Wouldn’t goalposts along the route better serve those who have decided to move forward? For those who’ve benefited, did you take yours and cut and run? Where’s the due diligence? If you’ve noticed something amiss in the blogosphere have you ignored it or assumed someone else would address it? You’re certainly not required to be self-sacrificing, but that’s not paying it forward either. Remember, whatever you focus on expands and what you abandon diminishes. We’ve extensively discussed the scope, purpose, focus and implementation of proper BWE messaging (along with its upkeep) here and at a handful of forums. So please, bookmark this post and use as a reference if necessary. Let’s review a few archived posts and continue after the jump.

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Scandal Creator Smacks Down Criticism Of Her Writing Choices & Why Some Black Women Still Don’t Get It

Did any of you watch the Screen Actors Guild (SAG) Awards last night? Here’s Kerry Washington looking lovely as usual.

Before we get into this conversation, I wanted to share the news that Survivior/Thriver Tina Turner is poised to become a Swiss citizen and give up her US passport. This is important for several reasons, but what I want to focus on is how Ms. Turner is making choices that benefit her. She’s not holding onto people, places or positions that no longer carry water. She’s lived abroad for more than 20 years and is happily coupled, so there’s no reason for her to look back. Yet, some black women still don’t get it and will continue choosing the slow lane and throw roadblocks to impede the progress of others. Compare and contrast her choices with yours and ask yourself if you’re living for other people’s ideologies or your own? Does your cup runneth over or is it empty?

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Smart Black Women Will Craft Their Own Asian Woman Marriage Playbook

Girlfriend get your BA or JD, MD, PhD or MDiv AND your MRS!

Congrats to Priscilla Chan, aka Dr. Chan aka Mrs. Zuckerberg!

She’s every woman….meaning her potential is your potential however that manifests itself. This isn’t about chasing after a life partner but ATTRACTING those who will love and support you best! Sure, you can do it on your own…but why should you have to? Sometimes, it takes more STRENGTH to be vulnerable than live with false bravado.

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Did Steve Stoute Try To Link Kim Kardashian To His Black Woman Bashing?

Any black person with even a rudimentary knowledge about our history knows the reasons that black women’s bodies, hair texture, phenotype and skin shade have been historically politicized and dehumanized. In the context of interacting with the dominant white groups, blacks can intellectualize Eurocentric standards of beauty and worth hasn’t been supportive in acknowledging our particular beauty. In turn black men and women internalized this on varying levels, across the span of ethnicities and nationalities.

Typical West-African ‘Negroid’ features being labeled unattractive was a manipulation tool used by the dominating group for control. The attitude of defeat (from not being proud to come from ancestors who SURVIVED chattel slavery) has been passed amongst the black collective like a permanent defect upon birth. The present ongoing conflict lies in how black women and girls are continuously assaulted (physically, mentally, emotionally) by other blacks and the lack of accountability for it.

We have the POWER to change those patterns now.

Continue reading “Did Steve Stoute Try To Link Kim Kardashian To His Black Woman Bashing?”

Follow-Up To Marie Claire’s Fake Out Series On Love & Race

Marie Claire can try to spin it any way they like but the lopsided reporting in Love & Race reinforces white male bashing and black women intra-racial relationship myopia. Remember, everyone claiming to support your interests may not be. You must carefully evaluate people, places and practices.

Why didn’t Marie Claire publish the stories of these couples (Jonathan Sam/Shevy Katan) and (Arielle Davis/Ian Julie) instead of pulling the Bait & Switch? Glancing at Love & Race, it LOOKS attractive on the surface until you thoroughly READ the stealth OBVIOUS poisonous message DISCOURAGING non-white women/white men pairings!!

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See How Fast Blackistan Turned On Trayvon’s Mama Sybrina Fulton?

Just know when I was writing this I was watching Maya Rudolf on the Ellen Show. Tooo funneee. I was about to do a news and social media break because of the increasingly irritating “controversy” over Ann Romney being a Stay At Home Mother and some “feminist” brou-ha-ha which had my eyes glazing over. Class envy is such a wasted energy. Using poor women to argue a counterpoint is WRONG. The Talking Heads don’t care and some people voted against their self-interests and are suffering the consequences. Ann & Mitt are BILLIONAIRES y’all! They’re very, very rich and have lots and lots of privilege. NEXT!

There’s nothing stopping any woman from positioning herself to be in a similar situation. LIVING WELL. VERY WELL. 

Back to the matter at hand. Continue reading “See How Fast Blackistan Turned On Trayvon’s Mama Sybrina Fulton?”