The Way To Help People Out Of Mediocrity Is To Make Them Uncomfortable With It

Where are the standards?

Here I thought when a blogger referred to the slave mentality of most blacks it was harsh — except the behavior that was on display from one of my blog posts last week was revealed to be exactly that and worse. Every time I wonder how low things can go they sink further. I’m glad the blogging audience could see this unfold. Agree or disagree – we benefit from clarification. This is what I’ve observed:

  • Women who lie, lie, lie and deny, deny, deny. Unsuccessfully.
  • Women who are single-issue advocates. Once they get “theirs” it’s time to check out.
  • Women sitting on the sidelines. Coddling unsavory behavior.
  • Women comforting perpetrators as victims, ignoring the actual victims.
  • Women offering mealy-mouthed platitudes about how they “wish” it would all go away everyone would get along so they can put their masks on and go back to sleep.
  • Women who may “care” as the day is long, but will walk all over you if you let them.
  • Women using other people’s forums for further venting time, rehashing their one-sided conflicts with other people and generally stirring the pot. Whiners not doers.
  • Women who claim to not be taking sides but choosing one by settling for less.
  • Women allowing anyone onto their forums  — like a certain white guy who isn’t dating or married to a black woman, identified himself as having had personal issues to resolve and has been using us for entertainment for well over two years now. He’s dropped little bits of poison into numerous conversations. He has not produced any tangible results that have uplifted black women, but because he claims interest in black women’s issues, some of you lap it up. WHY?
  • Women who can get along with you…as long as you dance in the gutter with them.
  • Women who feel entitled to benefits without paying sweat equity or reciprocating in kind.
  • Women claiming they support a cause but have not done anything substantial to build it, grow it or sustain it. It’s like claiming to be on a diet but eating a gallon of ice cream daily.

If the core BWE forums shut down today would you be prepared to fill the vacuum?

Do you liken this to a “club” where we rub off decals and trade decoder rings? Accuse people of jealousy over the most petty and superficial indicators of “success”? Spend the bulk of your time at forums where you wail and moan about the latest DBR behavior…of DBRs. Are you still so black-male identified that you can’t fathom the concept of being your own woman and actively block other black women from getting out of the Matrix?

Do you still get angry at other black women for speaking the truth? Do you offer anything in return when you ask other people to help you? Are you even remotely grateful for the BWE forums? I don’t need external validation from uncommitted parties and fair-weather “friends”. My values sustain my worth. No emotional high fives are required. Most of you are not willing to risk short-term inconvenience for a lifetime of gain. I’m looking for adults who can use discernment. I’m seeking maturity. We’re not 12 years old and this isn’t a game!

You can say what you think are the catch-phrases du jour.  You can shift responsibility and duck for cover until you think you’ve made it. You can throw rocks and run. Or you can respond earnestly that you don’t have it all figured out or you may have lost your way and we can brainstorm together on solutions after you’ve proven reliability and taken full responsibility for your inadequate or foul behavior.  Only one of these options remotely suggests the fortitude and honesty necessary.

If the BWE message can be employed by any random black woman why is there a NEED FOR THE BWE MESSAGE TO BEGIN WITH? Shouldn’t black women already KNOW these things and act accordingly? I’ve got other things I can be doing.  I’ll make this forum a cheese, wine and chocolate blog and enjoy a much more peaceful online life. This is a defining moment for certain because I’ve noted how time and time again black women have taken a common sense conversation (about alpha males for example) and twisted it into something completely unrecognizable.

Would you hand your baby off to complete strangers and “hope” they’d raise the kid well? All for the sake of giving them an opportunity to be a parent? Wouldn’t you want to make sure they weren’t child-molesters or neglectful?

Apparently we’re living in parallel worlds. I pay more attention to the FRUIT OF THY LABOR. I don’t estimate what’s in someone’s heart or what they claim their intentions are. If you wanted to support a charitable organization wouldn’t you first inquire what their needs were? Wouldn’t you seek some sort of constructive feedback? Wouldn’t the organization make sure the checks had all cleared? That volunteers were doing something or at the places they said they were going to be? Or is it a free for all? Aren’t there any boundaries?

I will be honest, there have been times where I’ve felt my eyes bleed at reading some of the content of the core BWE messengers. That is usually an indication I’ve been impacted in a way that makes me uncomfortable. Most of us don’t like being made to feel uncomfortable for any length of time – if at all.

This is where reaffirming focus on the big picture comes into play. I may personally want to employ certain nuances and subtleties (and can do so privately) but the larger collective of women cannot. It takes walking a razor thin line and not compromising. That won’t work on a mass scale without destroying the message. Since most of those reading the message at the BWE forums don’t have an end game devoid of their comfort, the issue of remaining focused on saving the lives of as many black women and girls gets tossed rather quickly. It becomes about them and why those who won’t compromise won’t let them “be”.

Most women are reading the content at these forums and not making any of the recommended changes. It’s why we continually circle the same points repeatedly. The focus instead becomes about supporting individuals not principles. So now the new motto excuse is “give a brotha sista” a chance? Anybody? People want to be in communion with others who talk about making informed choices. It’s a reflection of themselves after all. They want to be part of a growing crowd of black women who want better. They tell each other they deserve it. We do of course but how are you going to advance to “better” walking backwards towards the gutter?

  • Produce.
  • Problem-Solve.
  • Protect.
  • Provide.

The very same qualities women should be looking in mates are what those who wish to take leadership roles in the BWE social justice movement must possess. We can evaluate the effectiveness of the “relationship” by how well these are being executed. The other option is to assist in the work and be a supporter or would-be ally. Which is great of course – but you don’t get to jockey for inclusion of a leadership role. You don’t get to be a surgeon, astronaut or other skilled position-holder just by referring to yourself as one. Humility and the ego are like oil and water.

The other thing to consider is how many of the compromised are already out and safe and have a fall-back position. Which is why they are missing the inherent danger to those women who do not. They are obstructing the path to freedom with a lot of distractions. This is about life vs. death. Those are absolutes. Establishing and adhering to a message while keeping your eyes on the prize is not something most people are seriously willing to do. Most have not weighed the costs beforehand so dropping out or lowering the bar is simply a matter of time. The hubris that many of those assume their familiarity with BWE messaging brings will be fatal to other women.

There is no difference between you and those actively working against the BWE message when you have compromised it to the point that would render it ineffective. We can’t be “hugged up” on each other. We do not have time to take the scenic route, to give people time to pick lint out of their navels, to give them space to sort things through, to be “gentle” (it’s okay you can come out of the burning house at your own pace!), to meet for tea and coffee or to argue semantics.

It would be far more productive to just admit you only want to employ certain facets of the BWE message and leave the bulk of the serious work to those willing to see it through to completion. This is why so many of you take issue with the disciplined execution by the core BWE messengers. And constantly gripe about it. And argue that someone is trying to tell you what to do. We can predict your responses with 99.999% accuracy. Which should tell you something. You want others to compromise. You want Door # 3. You want BWE-lite. It’s better to have tangible results you’ve produced from doing some of work than focusing your ego to lay claim to advancing a movement when you have barely stepped to the plate to take second swing.

You can’t have it both ways.

You can however gauge your reaction (or level of outrage) as an indication of how serious you are.

P.S.  It’s time for you fence-sitters to get off your butts! It’s time for all of you who declare support for the BWE message to actually support the work of the BWE messengers.

54 Replies to “The Way To Help People Out Of Mediocrity Is To Make Them Uncomfortable With It”

  1. I most certainly don't want BWE-lite and I'm happy that most of the BWE blogs that I keep dealing with are unwavering and composed enough to keep giving it to all of us straight actually. I know that I have a loooootttttt of introspection to do and things that I have to work on and continuously keep up with, plus I'm working on a degree while working full time. I go to therapy once a week for an hour.

    I am so glad and grateful that the BWE blgos have brought up introspection fully and honestly so that I can do the work on myself and mistakes that I have made interacting with other people. Introspection for me is still a process, and I suppose it always will be even as my life improves. It's not as if I'm going to die a perfect being! LOL


    It’s better to have tangible results you’ve produced from doing some of work than focusing your ego to lay claim to advancing a movement when you have barely stepped to the plate to take second swing.

    This is very true. Fence sitting got me nowhere and sadly it took me late in life to see that also, on another note.

    1. Those who are fence-sitting and giving lip service but not really supporting the BWE message are also undermining things in their own way. Everyone must pay it forward. We're not trying to replace one mammy/mule role for another.

  2. I'm going to be closing comments on this post tomorrow. I think all of the valid points have been addressed. Thank you to everyone who contributed.

  3. The certain white guy…..I know EXACTLY who you are talking about. There was a certain facebook group that resigned from… I felt I ***deserved*** better (LOL) than to be in a group where some creepy white guy is allowed to have a voice (or create drama depending upon how you look at it) for a group about black women empowerment. Especially when he is *NOT* dating or MARRIED to a bw. Why is he all up in our business??? Was the fact that he has NO romantic ties to a bw ever mention by the group admins? NOPE. It goes to show, some of these "empowered" bw aren't as shrewd as the claim to be. But yeah I do feel you, the quality of that certain admins blog has gone down hill. I stoped reading it over a year ago.

    1. I am certain the administrator(s) is (are) well aware of this guy's life story. They linked to a 2009 blog post from another BW who was touting him where he spoke about it AND simultaenously complained that a core BWE had kicked him off her forum for being intrusive! He has continually circled many BW's blogs, social netowrking sites, etc since 2009 which is how I even know about him in the first place. He's like an infection that won't go away! He's another infiltrator and the BW supporting his invasion of what should be sacred spaces are traitors as far as I'm concerned. I've had to bar him from those networks and it was particularly disturbing to see him at yet another forum. This is the "lip service" portion of those who claim to be in support of BWE messaging. Protect the message at all costs or you are really not serious.

      1. Exactly this is why more blogs run by BW even those who state that they are not BWE or any kind of IRR blogs should still kick out trolls and block them in any case, because if those BW are trying to convey a certain message then can't they see how these Jerry Springer-acting troglodytes are going to trip the up on purpose? Can't they recognize when people with no home training are purposely trying to mess with what they're creating? I have two blogs, heck maybe three blogs, run by BW that I have in mind when I'm saying this and again I'm not talking about black celeb gossip blogs or the like, as I don't visit those.

        1. I'm not really that concerned with non-BWE blogs. I don't want other people glomming onto our work and subverting it while calling themselves a BWE messenger. This is why the readers really need to be more discerning. A subverted message, reconfigured and misaligned means the end of BWE. Not on my watch.

  4. I saw my mom struggle with her ex DBRBM husband. Then I saw her meet a white man, who moved her into his house, along with my sisters, (I was at college). I saw, for the first time, my mom in a healthy relationship where she is treated with the utmost respect. I saw the way relationships were supposed to be, and I realized how far I had set myself back worrying about men who could never offer me what I deserve. After seeing my mom’s relationship, and reading your words, I realized how short I was selling myself. Not anymore.

    My standards have gone up. For me, for whom I associate with, and for who I date.

    1. Miss S: Your abundant life (that's been waiting for you to embrace it) thanks you for accepting it finally.

  5. Faith, I hope this isn’t too off topic.
    Your blog, and Khadija’s, have been such a blessing for me. I came across yours last year and realized that many of the things that I felt were missing from other feminist blogs were right here.

    I’m intelligent, motivated, classy, and have never been down for the mess that many black women engage in…. except for chasing after men who didn’t have anything to offer me. My deadbeat dad was one of them, and I spent quite a few years trying to replace him with men who were just like him. At the end of last year, I had had enough. I did a lot of praying, and self reflection, and I did a lot of reading on this blog and Khadija’s. I’m in a whole different place now.

    1. Miss S: I am very glad that you're finding the resources useful. After you go through your transformative process please pay it forward and support the message!

  6. For those who are wise and willing to do the work, a little discomfort goes a long way. Discomfort is an opportunity to grow and change. This forum is great place to exchange ideas, elevate our thinking, and inject some positivity. That is what a great blog does, in the most uncomplicated way.

  7. "•Women allowing anyone onto their forums — like a certain white guy who isn’t dating or married to a black woman, identified himself as having had personal issues to resolve and has been using us for entertainment for well over two years now. He’s dropped little bits of poison into numerous conversations. He has not produced any tangible results that have uplifted black women, but because he claims interest in black women’s issues, some of you lap it up. WHY?"

    I've noticed the above and I am particularly disturbed by it.

    1. Yes and wasn't it past time to address it…or disengage? These are the things we all need to consider. How serious are we really about black women being empowered?

  8. I'll mention here that the only BWE sites I read are Halima's, Khadija's, and Faith's. I don't have time to go to other sites, so I have NO idea who is there or what is being said there. I 've never even heard of some of these bloggers that some of y'all are mentioning. I don't even want to know which so-called BWE blogger is hosting a blog and allows ANYONE to come there and poison bw!!!!! I would instantly lose ALL respect for her and distance myself from her! Why would I want to have any type of association with that type of bw?? SMH

    Bw, clean out your houses!! At the same time, bw must remember that you don't have to be loud, rude, or crude to put any poisoner out the door.

    1. ….and this is why I've now said something. This isn't just about one blogger, but a steady drip of devaluation of core BWE precepts by several who are also encouraging this amongst each other. I see many intelligent, well-educated, articulate black women who have shown by their actions to be in full support of upholding the dead black community and are still emotionally tied to black men at the expense of BW's self-determination. Despite all talk to the contrary. There was an African writer who immediately pounced on us for agreeing to do the Aftenposten interview claiming we would come across as desperate and how we shouldn't look to white men to "save" us. Since she continually rages against BW for their failings she still cares and as such has also stated how despite all of this she'd prefer BW to stay with BM. This is the definition of insanity since we know the mass collective of BW and children have been abandoned. One of these bloggers had a forum before I did. This is why I have been so concerned and disappointed. If like minds connect I could see the fracture happening in real time as those who are still tethered to the old model cling to it ever more tightly and lash out at those of us who want to implement the new model: free agency for black women. I needed to see all of this unfold up close, while I still hoped somebody would say something. When I realized that wouldn't be happening and in fact would further descend into oblivion I did remove myself. This is why it needed to be addressed. I was waiting for someone else to do it, but realized that was not going to happen and I had to step up. Identifying those who are not like-minded is absolutely though even as a simple means of self-protection. You don't want to assume you're working towards the same goals with those trying to knee-cap you or tie an anvil around your neck to slow you down.

      1. This, and not entirely on another note, is why I’m sorry (Faith here -- not linking to the blogger) think tank blog became private. BW need to be exposed to something relentless and real!

  9. @
    Most black women have been controlled by family, DBR black men, and the "black community" all their lives.

    Absolutely! However, so many AA women do not realize they're being controlled. A part of their programming chip has convinced many of them that they are "in charge." It's like mules believing they're in charge because they do all the work. LOL!!!!!
    Also, another angle to this is that it's virtually impossible to convince Africans (who don't mingle much with AAs and most of them don't) and whites in general that bw are being controlled by bm, DBRbm, AND the bw who are the lapdogs of bm in the bc. I've been in countless debates and discussions with folks from these 2 groups who do NOT believe that ANYBODY can tell AA women what to do. In my experience, I would say that the overwhelming masses of folks believe that the typical AA woman is very STRONG and self-directed. LOL!!!

    1. This is how the repetition of the "Strong Black Woman" lie has been accepted at face value. It is the complete antithesis!

    2. I agree, although I wouldn't say it's in the programming to believe that their in charge. Part of the programming is telling themselves that it's their deserved position in life and that they can't do anything about it.

      The majority of black women I've known know for a fact that their lives are anything but in their control.

      Waiting for checks, child support, food stamps, WIC, dead beat men?! Any of them who does is truly more delusional that I thought!

      1. Perhaps those are the experiences of women in certain class structures, but what about the women who have the 2-3 degrees and making $100K+?

        1. Very true also. I guess I'm used to seeing just one type of delusional woman. I need to change my thinking.

          Most of the women like that whom I've met who are well educated have their heads on straight.

          1. Basically you have to consider any random black woman to be an indoctrinated potential time bomb, like their DBR male counterparts. Your common sense and standards will set them off because you're not going with the Mule/Mammy/Sister Soldier/Save A Brotha/Non-reciprocal "program". Now that I have finally accepted this fully -- and believe me a part of me still doesn't want to -- I can be armed against the disappointment and sabotage. Mostly…I'm still working that out.

        2. True the educated, professional BW making a certain amount of money who don't struggle and don't have to still just place themselves willingly in the service of the BC and sometimes in the services of deadbeat family members.

  10. Part 2
    I was angry at myself b/c I felt like a failure b/c I never accomplished the things i had set to do to empower and enlighten BW (create a BW's magazine, start a BW website org, develop films) the list goes on. You can't get a message across being angry cursing and yelling at everyone -- that I did. I was angry. If I had taken all that anger and frustration and knowledge and done something more productive there's no telling how far I would be in terms of BWE.

  11. I read this post this morning and I stepped back from replying. This will probably be first of a couple replies because this post has a lot to digest to it.

    I started my own blog a while ago but I had to leave it on the backburner when I got hurt last year. After I healed, I had transitioned to doing BWE with young girls (8-13). I have a unique opportunity where I interact with young black girls in a non BC construct which allows me to sow into them there without interference from the DBRs (still got to deal with White America and their issues though). As part of the BWE movement, I've taken what I've learned to work with them to make sure that at their young ages, they KNOW that they have options than the status quo. These girls are already feeling those pressures now, even at 5 and 6!

    I know though if Evia, Khadija, you, Halima, and other BWE bloggers had to close shop, my blog would reopen because I'd know that it would definitely be time to start shining a light on BWE myself. That day may be coming soon anyway.

    1. IamKM: It sounds like it would be a good idea for you to start blogging again. You can decide on the frequency of your posts but even one well-placed post a month can have great positive impact. You just never know. It's something to consider.

  12. This reminds me of a battlecry! I think this is amazing! This is what I love. Never pull punches, its too late for that. I'm just blessed I got to experience the BWE as young as I did. I changed my mind and life before I'm legal to drink and I was able to touch the lives of my family. If people are still just reading then they might be a lost cause because it feels like I'm watching Noah and building a boat of my owns. Thanks to you, Evia, Halima, Khadija and the others I've grown wealthier, thinner, and more aligned with my wants and goals.

    Don't sugar coat anything, I owe you everything for now doing so.

    1. Hmmm. It's useless to say this now but I wish I were 18 years old and hearing all of the wisdom so far from the BWEs and not in my 30s.

      1. Ak: I feel the same way -- and I'm a blog administrator. We're all learning as we go but as always we must be focused and uncompromising.

  13. — ITA about the "uncomfortable" statement. "Be teachable" is one thing I've definitely learned how to do while reading the BWE messages. My current issue is the "that doesn't apply to me" mentality. But, once I re-read, I realize that 99.99% of the time, it usually does. I'm still learning 🙂

    Re: "If the core BWE forums shut down today, would you be able to fill the vaccuum?"
    — I would definitely be heartbroken, but I believe many of these BWE sites gave me so much valuable wisdom and *resources* to supplement my journey towards living well. Articles, videos, podcasts, and BOOKS! And, these aren't solely about BWE; they're about making the best life for yourself in ALL aspects.

    — So, yes -- one thing I've learned is discernment between messengers. If I am not receiving anything of *value*, then why am I wasting my time?

    Re: "Women letting anyone onto their forums- like a certain white guy…"
    Thank you.
    Thank you.
    I honestly thought I was the only one!
    Please ladies, learn how to discern between messengers!
    A man's *whiteness* should NOT be the sole factor!

    — I realize, I've done a massive de-lurkification attempt, but you mentioned in one of your past comments that you spend a lot of time finding this information for us and you want to hear some feedback on your efforts. So, this is my way of saying, YES! I appreciate everything you do and please continue to do so! Your work is amazing and valuable!

    1. I also thought I was the only one with the same response to the "certain white guy."

      Actually there are more than one of them… and one has stated that he is married… to a non-BW… but he still "supports" IR… he also drops poison.

      1. There's a few questionable folks and questionable tactics that have yet gone unchallenged at a few forums run by black women who purport to be in support of black women's empowerment. Some of them have actually been blogging this topic longer than I, but I've observed a steady devaluation for nearly one year. Like I've stated, I've observed but not said anything. I'm bringing the larger issue forth publicly as recent events have really called into question how effective the BWE message will be in the near future if we all start falling off the rails. I again do not speak for anyone else but myself, but I see a major problem brewing and I had to say something. Whatever may or may not happen I have said my peace.

    2. We're all still learning. I am not under any impression that I have it "all" figured out. I appreciate your feedback as well. I'm aware there are many newer readers at this forum (less than one year) and I'd like to hear from you as well as the younger readers (-25) to find out how useful this information exchange is and how it applies to your particular circumstances. I can only guess if I'm hearing from those in my age range (35+). We need effective messengers who can reach out to their peers.

      1. Hi Faith!

        I must admit that back when I was a serial lurker (lol), my behavior was that of a sterotypical BW churchgoer who shouts "Amen!" at what should be done, but then disregards those steps as soon as I leave my pew. That was over a year ago. Like I said before, "Be Proactive In Your Own Happiness" is my slogan of the new year. Back in my high school days, I thought that just saying I'm going to do something was good enough. Even now, I still have to berate myself sometimes when I'm lackadasical/procrastinating about doing something that I geneuinely want to do for my wellbeing.

        1. This post definitely rings true for me. I'm just so glad I caught on during my high school days and got rid of the majority of my bad habits, unlike most girls my age who are still walking blind!! It's really a blessing to have bloggers like you, Khadija, Gina, Evia, et. al to have forums like these where likeminded folks can discuss and communicate with one another.

          1. If these forums were to disappear, I'd be definitely sad, but I think I've soaked up enough knowledge from these forums to keep my journey going on my own. Most black women aren't prepared to go without a leader to tell them what to do. Most black women have been controlled by family, DBR black men, and the "black community" all their lives. How do you get the point across that it's okay to go outside and breathe the fresh air?

            Khadija made an excellent point when she said that we can't treat this like any other "black community" establishment that we're used to. BWE is about action. I had enough common sense to realize this over a year ago. Most will ignore and continue business as usual.

            The difference is that out of 1,000 black women who will never learn, if 10 young black girls, like myself, get the message and get what it's about, then I consider that a success. 🙂

          2. And as the BWE bloggers continue to help young black women like myself, then it is our job as part of the gratitude that we owe to all of you to keep spreading the word to whoever will listen. 🙂

          3. Indeed and if you help spread the BWE message to other young women like yourself in the ways you can relate best you will have paid it forward.

          4. There are women twice and three times your age who have still not caught on. They are not likely to either.

        2. Hello love, yes we ALL have to deal with the procrastination beast. Myself included. I still have an as-yet incomplete blog-based book that was supposed to have been released well over a year ago. I felt I needed more time to marinate as a blogger even though I had produced well over 300 blog posts by that time. Now, I think I have enough variety of topics all under maximizing our lives it would do a book form justice. Anyway, as I've stated you are in such a great position to make the most empowering choices for yourself as you are in the bloom of your youth. Gosh, even saying that sounds archaic! Yet, it's true…so make the most of this time as I'm certain you will.

  14. Part 5

    BWE is not trying to program with AA women the way most of them currently are! Trying to do anything with most AA women the way they are would be a waste of time—because AA women are conditioned to self-destruct. We see this all around us.

    BWE is about the willingness to engage in critical thinking, and personal transformation in support of abundant life.

    Let me wrap this up: BWE is NOT a game like the typical Black church/mosque. Lip service and the blind recitation of slogans are not enough. Lip service and the recitation of slogans won't shield anybody involved from scrutiny and accountability. Instead, folks will look to see if one's actions are consistent with core BWE values such as self-determination, vetting, and reciprocity.

    There are standards that will be consistently applied to everybody involved. Across the board. From those who are thought of as leadership and throughout the ranks.

    1. Khadija: Thank you once again for breaking it down…so it can forever be "broke", lol! I can't really add anything to your astute and thorough analysis, so I'm going to let it marinate.

  15. Part 4

    [**In the modern era, BM are the primary and deadliest oppressors of AA women, and AA women have been trained to hate themselves while unconditionally supporting BM.]

    Similarly, regarding BWE work, anybody who is sincerely interested in BWE is somebody who is willing to make some changes. If a BW is not willing to reevaluate some things, and make some changes if necessary in order to achieve abundant life, then there's very little that BWE thought can do for/with her.

  16. Part 3

    I believe that the demands are similar to what Rev. Albert Cleage (father of writer Pearl Cleage) described in his book, Black Christian Nationalism:

    When an individual walks down front and says, "I want to join the [church that Rev. Cleage founded]," he publicly admits that he desires to be changed. In accepting him we agree to assist in his transformation. If he has too much arrogance to admit that the white man's oppression has messed up his mind, the Black Nation can do little for him. The total Black Christian Nationalist program is founded upon training. This is our basic contribution to the Black struggle.

    No other Black group in America (other than the Black Muslims) is willing to face seriously the fact that Black people are psychologically sick and have been systematically conditioned to hate themselves and love their oppressor.**

    Every other Black group tries to program with Black people the way they are (which is obviously an impossibility)…

    Black Christian Nationalism, pg. 212-213.

  17. Part 2

    For the BW congregants, it's about entertainment and soothing their nerves to accept another week of nonstop assaults on their dignity. For the corrupt church/mosque leadership, it's about getting paid to tickle their followers' ears. If AA religious leadership stopped telling BW what they want to hear (and started telling them what they need to hear), then the membership will flee. And find somebody else to tickle their ears.

    The above corrupt model is NOT what BWE is about. BWE is about personal transformation in order to live abundantly. The demands that BWE makes upon both activists AND supporters is quite different from the typical AA church/mosque game-playing.

  18. Faith,

    Part 1

    I'll say it the plain way: A lot of BW are responding to BWE as if it's like the typically corrupt AA house of worship. BW are responding with the same repertoire of game-playing behaviors that they use in their corrupt Black churches/mosques. This is the ONLY participation "model" that most AA women are familiar with. So, they apply this same dysfunctional participation model in their responses to a variety of things, including BWE activism.

    In the typical corrupt Black church/mosque, dishonest lip service and blind recitation of slogans is sufficient. There are NO standards taught or expected of anyone. This applies from the corrupt leadership down to the (often equally corrupt) followers. The typical corrupt Black church/mosque is NOT about personal transformation to get closer to God. Not at all.

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