Oh ladies the indoctrination is a deep, deep rabbit hole! Is this how Clive Davis sees black women? Check this out —
Saving All My Love For You (video) Song about a woman who has settled for side-piece status
My friends try and tell me
Find a man of my own
But each time I try
I just break down and cry
Cuz I’d rather be home feelin’ blue
So I’m saving all my love for you
Fallin’ (video) Song about a woman who has settled for NO VALUE mate battling common sense versus complacency in her failure to leave a dysfunctional relationship with a prison inmate/criminal.
I keep on fallin’
In and out of love with you
Sometimes I love ya
Sometimes I feel blue
At times I feel good
At times I feel used
Lovin’ you darlin’
Makes me so confused
(The “confusion” comes from deliberately circumventing logic and life-affirming behavior)
If you note the video has our heroine traveling far and wide leaving the gritty streets of the ‘hood to prison for her “love”. Whether one has chosen second status to a married man or one has adopted the “Ride or Die” mantra both are death traps.
This is a particular and measured indoctrination to keep black women cycling despair and powerlessness.
Now let’s look at some of the other messages and depraved reaction by blacks……
Whitney was not considered black enough at one point when her career began. That seems incredible to hear, but her polished high-class gown-laden image was largely rejected by blacks as being inauthentic. Isn’t that pathetic? Meanwhile Alicia adopted a hood persona where her biracial heritage and light skin gave her instant status. She used to discuss why she didn’t want to wear her loose (since it blows in the wind with ease) but never came out directly and said it was due to black males’ obsession with skin color and hair texture. When she and India.Aire were both nominated for Grammys for their debut albums and she cleaned up but India went home empty she said she didn’t want the variation in their skin tone to become a point of contention as some had suggested it played a huge factor in her winning.
Whitney and Alicia had rumors about their alleged relationships with women following them early in their careers which they both silenced through marriage to inadequate, gold-diggers. Yeah, I said it! Men can be gold-diggers and chances are if it’s an African-American or similarly functioning black male he’s always looking to abdicate his role by mooching off a black woman. Please don’t bother sending me angry emails or comments as they’ll go straight to the garbage bin.
Bobby Brown had a few hit songs (what was it…two?) and even more out of wedlock children (four, five or six?) by the time he married Whitney. Oh wait…never mind he had a few more post-Whitney. Whatever. If she was going to marry a male she had her pick of eligible bachelors. Child-free. Monied. Accomplished in other industries. Remember, Whitney was the biggest star in the world at one point, especially coming off the Bodyguard film and soundtrack. She picked an ex-boy band performer with no discernible skills and as we saw during Being Bobby Brown, a substance abuse problem.
Alicia has married a producer with a waning career, a multi-million dollar IRS bill, two out of wedlock kids as well as an ex-wife and their children. Alicia writes and produces her own songs and is at the peak of her career right now. Regardless as a songwriter she’ll continue to draw a considerable reserve from publishing rights. Whitney’s family and handlers at least made sure she had a pre-nup. Who knows with Alicia? Besides, Alicia is not exactly an innocent in this situation. She knowingly took up with married man while his wife was pregnant (and wants the other women’s kids to call her mom, too). That’s gangsta! Now of course if a woman accidentally (on purpose) gets pregnant while her marriage is on the rocks to try to hold onto to her husband that’s unfortunate, but it also means somebody was having unprotected sex…while also having sex with another woman (and probably one or two more for all we know). Gross!
It also means this guy has a lot of mouths to feed and other financial responsibilities and what better way to dodge all of that by finding a big fat meal ticket and sealing the deal by getting her pregnant as well? Alicia gave birth to a boy a few months ago. She’ll have to get back to work soon since she’s now supporting seven more people. That was her choice though. Again, with ALL of the available men in the entire world she chooses to “love” a broke, ethically/morally bankrupt leech? Will drugs soon follow in her case like with Whitney?
I realize some woman have correctly highlighted Jill Scott and her “wincing” after being abandoned by a serial dead-beat dad, Fantasia’s (sad) suicide attempt and abortion from taking up with a married guy who was clearly using her, Erykah Badu’s choice of having a succession of out-of-wedlock children with various rappers and the peculiar choices of numerous black women at choosing kamikaze relationships instead of seeking out healthy, functional, financially-secure men from the global village – but where they stumble we can scurry away from such obvious landmines.
Around this time I expect someone will want to offer examples of non-black women who’ve also made foolish and costly mistakes with male gold-diggers. Britney Spears comes to mind. Yup..and she had her own emotional problems a few years ago, but the fact remains she also went after someone else’s man who was ready to jump ship for a bigger meal ticket and paid the price for it in the end. Britney has recovered but what about Whitney? What about you and your loved ones?
Whitney has never recovered vocally or career-wise for her folly. Alicia’s spiral will be interesting to watch to say the least. For you cannot write songs claiming to be empowered while choosing a death lifestyle. I’m reminded though that Alicia is an abandoned child herself whose father would not stick around so this dysfunction has a familiar pattern. Only therapy and making solid choices can remedy these types of situations – along with some prayer and solid guidance. I won’t be sticking around to see it though.
Whitney came from a two-parent home and had a pedigree. I wonder how much conforming to boxes (be it the dead black community or orientation) has hindered them? We may never know, but as a consumer I have to tell you I am under zero obligation to financially support entertainers, especially when I see them setting such bad examples for other women to follow.
Sure, someone could argue I’m being judgmental. They’d be right. I’m out to protect my self-interests and guarding my mindset. If I’m not going to support the obvious DBRs and No Value folks – the rap artists, comedians who ridicule us and other black women bashers why should I finance the careers and lifestyles of (talented, educated) black women (with numerous available options who chose the gutter instead) are still in the Matrix and their propaganda messages meant to keep other women trapped?
If we’re going to be free, then we must truly free ourselves and move away from all of this mess. Learn from their mistakes but don’t excuse them lest you fall into the same pit.