Channeling Success One New Habit At A Time

Lately, I’ve been spending more time in serious focus on what I’m allowing to filter into my brain and what I export. To say I’m determined to “think more positively” doesn’t begin to explain it. I want a complete lifestyle change – or I should say a warp speed upgrade. Since I know this will not be handed to me, I must make every effort at being smarter not working aimlessly to achieve my goals.

African-Americans who are still clinging to the old models are going to be left in a massive free fall the likes many have not seen nor are prepared for. It upsets me how little the black intelligentsia, technologists and elite have done to help. I wasn’t expecting anything from the do-nothing Civil Rights organizations. So many are busy congratulating themselves on being “innovative” or secretly struggling while pretending to “have it all” or working their fingers to the bone or being lackadiasical.   

Lucky for me (ha) I had a major career upheaval in 2006 and saw that a permanent change was necessary by 2008. I’ve been searching for a niche while finding and executing my voice. I will be a fully integrated business owner with a passive income stream by the end of the year. More black women need to join the ranks of the self-employed before the un thinkable happens. The bottom hasn’t yet fallen out nor do I wish it to, but being ready to roll with the punches won’t make the crash so traumatic for those likely to be “caught” out there.

I’ve been reading a number of articles in the Harvard Business Review that I think the audience will find most useful.

In Nine Things Successful People Do Differently, psychologist Heidi Grant Halvorson explains things that seem so obvious – but that we don’t do! This is what separates the wanna-be from the achiever.

#9 Habit —

Focus on what you will do, not what you won’t do. Do you want to successfully lose weight, quit smoking, or put a lid on your bad temper? Then plan how you will replace bad habits with good ones, rather than focusing only on the bad habits themselves. Research on thought suppression (e.g., “Don’t think about white bears!”) has shown that trying to avoid a thought makes it even more active in your mind. The same holds true when it comes to behavior — by trying not to engage in a bad habit, our habits get strengthened rather than broken.

Taking cues from the article, I’ve compiled my own list of habits we can adapt or refine to suit our needs.

Be As Clear As Possible About Your Goals ~ Know what your passion is and fully pursue it

Don’t Wait ~ Well this is also so obvious, right? Yet the fear monster, the busy life, the numerous obligations will always take precedence and bump that roll out of said business venture you’ve been meaning to launch for years.

Track Your Progress ~ This isn’t a mantra focused on looking back. Nor is it solely about looking forward. It’s a simple evaluation of where you’re at and where you want to go and how you’re going to get there. Who will help you along the way? Find a mentor, business advisor and resident cheerleader.

Kill Your Inner Naysayer  ~ aka BELIEVE IN YOURSELF! Because as I write in one my song lyrics /Ain’t nobody else gonna love you/Just believe in yourself/Nobody’s gonna do for you/What you won’t do for yourself

Test Yourself  ~  Define what you want. Take small steps versus a big leap if you are hesitant. Guard your idea “baby” from outside attack but be willing to listen to good advice.

Don’t Be Afraid To “Fail”  ~ Failure is falling down and staying there. Everything else is just a fumble or a stumble. You can recover.

Keep Going No Matter What  ~ We know family and friends are often our biggest detractors and they’re projecting their own fears and life cop-outs onto you. It isn’t necessary to have everything figured out A-Z, but a good template certainly helps!

Be Confident, But Don’t Take Anything For Granted  ~ Don’t let your pride bounce a check you can’t cash.

Well, that’s my list. What about yours? Leave a comment for tips and tidbits.

9 Replies to “Channeling Success One New Habit At A Time”

  1. In terms of the fear monster, the most cited fear I hear is "OMG what if I can't do it?" which ties into your point of not waiting and not being afraid to fail. Maybe people haven't failed enough to realize that its sooo not a big deal… but its really not! lol

    Along with the inner naysayer are the outer ones that kill goals with a quickness. The truly succcessful know how to tune those external voices right out and focus on the most important opinion they'll receive: their own.

  2. "African-Americans who are still clinging to the old models are going to be left in a massive free fall the likes many have not seen nor are prepared for."

    After a while, this gets tiring to read these warnings, so I can't imagine what it's like to write it over and over. I'm starting to believe that black people are willfully ignorant and refuse to identify the changing tide around them. I also wonder how many have heard this warning before, and how many have genuinely never heard it. Maybe I'm just tired today, I dunno…

    "I will be a fully integrated business owner with a passive income stream by the end of the year. "

    I'm so proud of you!!! Doesn't it feel fabuous and liberating!

    1. Anilia: I'm working on it! The fear, the failure, the overthinking, the control all has to do with what we believe about ourselves. So the first step is being grateful for where we're at (seeing clearly and deciding to take steps towards something) and then moving! I doesn't have to be perfect or perfectly executed. We just have to keep moving forward.

    1. Thanks for that! Be sure to listen to the podcast!!! Actually…can you download it abroad?

        1. I meant for the Della Reese podcast, but this may be an issue as we go abroad and can\’t access iTunes US when it comes to getting certain media.

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