abundance is where women who don’t want to wallow in powerlessness go to create a better life

I’m having a poetic epiphany!

Between Questlove, Russell Simmons, Ashley Judd and now Lisa Price of Carol’s Daughter ganging up on black women, denying our heritage, telling us the only blacks are men and all the women are white, it seems the usual denigration has been kicked up a notch while they’re kicking us in the teeth.

You do realize this means we are “winning”, right?

The BWE message hasn’t even reached saturation point yet.

If you will take a lovely skip down Tumblr-ville you can find a plethora of blogs dedicated to celebrating the beauty of black women. BLACK women. These blogs weren’t even around a few months ago. We have fake-BWE bloggers now.  The integrity of the message is up to you. The continued elevation of black women is up to you as well. In fact, more women are getting the message and taking the red pill to get out of the DBR-Matrix!

We’re reclaiming our W.O.M.A.N.  Black woman-specific beauty. Not 1/16th of a snail’s head and donkey’s butt, or 2/34ths of purple, or any of the  extreme stretches of DNA strains some black people are grabbing to differentiate themselves from you know, the “regular”  and “plain” black folks. Er…I should say black WOMEN, since this is the core issue at hand: OUR DEVALUATION.

Don’t fall for the head fake out. They see the momentum and are trying to derail it. Keep your eyes on the prize!

Ashley Judd wrote a memoir where some media outlets decided t focus on her accurate analysis of hip-hop (c)rap music as promoting a rape culture and one that’s highly misogynistic. She left out the part where it was done by black males targeting black women.  It caused a lot of brouhaha as those with an interest in either a) continuing to leech off black women b) who want to keep black women from using their power to their benefit converged to silence her.

Even in cases of white DBR rappers like Eminem – he focused on his ex-wife and messed with a few pop stars — not the entire collective of white women. White men will not allow that! That’s how David Letterman found himself on the wrong side of the 8-ball when he overstepped his criticism of Sarah Palin and dragged her daughters into the mix.

There is no such protection in place for black women when they’re relying on it to come from black men. Which is why the black community is dead. Which is why black women should be seeking their bliss elsewhere. This is why the push by AA black males to join in “Rainbow Coalitions” (so they can have access to non-black women and breed out) is so detrimental to black women. Our Coalition Partners do not want us (er them) anyway)!! They do, however want the resources generated by AA black women. Which brings us back to YOU.

Everyone has benefited from the labor, intellect and resources of the AA woman.

From chattel slavery, to Antebellum South, through Reconstruction, ambling through Jim Crow through Civil Rights and even TODAY. Foreign blacks even got to move here to the US en masse. I want to remind you all again how much we are valued, but we don’t wield our clout effectively. How much we are desired by other men, but we instead focus on the ones who don’t want us.  How we are FREE to do as we wish, but we’re waiting for other people to tell us it’s okay to be healthy, happy and whole.

Don’t hold your breath – you’ll asphyxiate!

The Roots drummer, publicly spoke out against the slagging of an entire “industry”  – even though that’s not what happened. I was waiting for the “white people do bad stuff too” argument. Like when people mention Charlie Sheen to justify Chris Brown. Why, it wouldn’t surprise me if one day R. Kelly made a public statement against Roman Polanski  — something like “at least I didn’t drug my 13 year old”.

I’ve observed this particular fence-sitter who has been curiously silent about the clear examples of when the circumstances have applied. Readers may not be aware that out of his million ++ followers on Twitter he actually deigned to write to me once. This was after he recommended we follow another rapper whose profile photo showed a naked white woman’s buttocks – well naked except for the butt floss thong. It was a large enough t-shirt  — or the guy’s girth was anyway — that you could see it clearly even from a thumbnail photo. Mind you this was 2009 when I still thought I could have logical conversations with black males about their misogyny because I figured a successful intellectual conversation would surely convince someone to change the error of their ways? If they knew how they were hurting black women surely they’d stop, right? Yeah…I was a sucker! That’s when I realized the true nature of a DBR and how it isn’t tied to class, education or temperament.

Long story short, I was repulsed and asked why he’d recommend such a person. The “artiste” in question didn’t understand why I was offended and his friend summed it up rather succinctly,“She doesn’t want to be objectified.” Wow, such clarity was a shock to me. The players may change, but the game remains the same.

From the surge in teen sex trafficking in Oakland and countless other horror stories we can exchange involving black girls or the depraved behavior of DBR black males, it’s a never-ending merry-go-round. I don’t want to focus on this — but a famous member of a rap group could certainly bring to light some of the home-grown atrocities facing women who are likely to be fans of and supporters of their music. Yet, the only thing that got him to lumber out of his cave was to silence a famous white woman who brought some much-needed attention to things we are already aware of at this forum? Hmm….

The fact that Judd immediately backpedaled by speaking with Simmons on his Global Slime Grind site did. not. surprise. me. one. bit. Imagine this scenario as her potential thought-process: Simmons is her “friend”  — as much as more famous/wealthier black males are wont to access lighter, brighter, whiter women — because they can. She’s not getting any younger and should her marriage ever go south she needs to maintain a fallback position. She could gain 100lbs and be toothless and still find a black male who will see her white skin as a premium. Not to mention the fact, there are plenty of dysfunctional-black male identified black women who will side with random black males over anything, cutting their own throats — and yours – in the process! So it was a bit of C.Y.A. I don’t blame her really.

The situation with Carol’s Daughter is a little different (but not really). The line of hair care products was started by an AA woman for black women. The company’s latest campaign is featuring women – some of whom I thought were black  yet are apparently racial ninjas or genetic hybrids and have been approximating themselves as black women (AA) right under our noses! Replicants must be terminated….

By the way, I have Cherokee heritage on both sides of my family – my maternal and paternal great-grandmothers were. Unlike some African-Americans who leap at the chance to be the “other black” I could really care less. Why? I’m not Native American. Not to mention the fact that the Cherokee Nation has forcibly removed AAs from their tribal rolls for the past two decades — but not white Americans. They’re not the only tribe that’s doing this.  Update:  Reader GoddessM wrote about the Freedman disbarment.

I know a young woman who is Seminole and AA and she’s complained bitterly about the foul treatment she gets when applying for any benefits. They don’t want her getting anything! Her mother is “100%” Native American so she is legally entitled to receive whatever scholarships and assistance available. Black people had better wake up and get real. Their desire for splintering and being the “other black” puts them in a no-man’s land of ever-dwindling resources.

Besides, what’s wrong with being “just”  black? We already know most of us are not 100% as our ancestors intermingled with whites [by the way neither are they]. Those who are more recently biracial [with a parent of differing races, possibly a grandparent] are not special.  It’s some blacks who’ve placed a premium on that construct as they adopted the racist thinking of whites — who were protecting their land and resources from all the children white males had produced with black women during slavery.

Why is the expression of racial and ethnic pride such an albatross — for some black(ish) people? When I wrote about Paula Patton discussing why she rejected the “light-skin privilege” blacks wanted to bestow on her and how she refers to herself as black – not “biracial” one of my readers expressed her displeasure.  As I stated in that post, anyone who can use certain privileges that were given to them at our expense (but doesn’t) should be considered an ally. She didn’t like the idea of Patton being labeled “just” black as she put it. This reader is an AA woman married to a white man. I asked her if she was going to apply her stringent categorization to her children. I don’t think she had considered that aspect because she suddenly declared she wasn’t certain she’d have biological children. This is something AA women in particular DO need to think about. The random checking off of any categorization on the Census has repercussions beyond that moment. The allowance of anyone to call themselves black is something else we have to think about it. Likewise, rejecting people who could chose to “other” themselves but don’t should not be discouraged.

We’ve got enough “regular” black folks who want to be anything and everything but black. Here’s another scenario that has caused me stomach flips. One esteemed BWE blogger who has been using the term PAB [Passing As Black]. While I think everything that needed to be said was covered at Sojourner’s Passport I have something else to add.

When I see PAB I don’t read it as  —

Passing As Black as intended by Evia. I see —

Passing As Black

Imagine a white person saying because they want to reject the racial prejudice and other distasteful behavior of their family (or the white collective) they are now Passing As White — but they’re doing it to distinguish themselves from any random white person we might see while retaining their ethnic pride. It sounds a bit ridiculous doesn’t it? Since this is something that is self-defined and part of an identity or outlook to be determined by individual black/black(ish) women you can already see the problems that will emerge from the bastardization of a highly flawed, albeit somewhat sophisticated concept. The same way the use of the term “Alpha” male has been misused and misunderstood and a host of other core concepts, meant to be suggested as alternatives to the damaged thinking from dysfunctional blacks that’s been particularly reinforced and forced onto AA and other black women.

This is how stepping stones become stumbling blocks.

I also do not subscribe to the thought that AA heritage is solely or mostly one of pain [porn] and do not wallow in it. Just because some black people want to “other” themselves, some black people hate being black, some black people eat and promote dysfunction 24/7  doesn’t mean YOU [or I] have to.That’s why I advocate you separate yourselves from toxic residential areas and people. It was always about the mentality..not blackness.

I write the African-American Women Legacy Series Spotlight for this very reason. We have MUCH to be proud of. There have always been knuckle-heads and they’re not likely to go away. We already know the collective has been dragged into the gutter. How much more important it is that we promote our historic contributions. I have to say I am surprised that those women who’ve long escaped or were never-ensnared by the denigration traps that take out so many of us would be that bothered by the behavior of others that such measures are really necessary.

We can still pursue our hopes and dreams with our heritage and sanity intact.  Don’t support those who reject and denigrate you. Later for the haters!

The whole point is FREEDOM OF CHOICE DEPLOYED WITH WISDOM. Are you exercising yours and thinking in terms of building generational dominance for your family and positioning yourself to build one if not? We are so on the verge of a major breakthrough that will be a tide that lifts many black women out of cesspools. Let’s keep moving forward.

38 comments to abundance is where women who don’t want to wallow in powerlessness go to create a better life

  • Truth P.

    Are you exercising yours and thinking in terms of building generational dominance for your family and positioning yourself to build one if not?
    Yes. I am still preparing myself/studying to take a test that will ultimately get me into college for the first time in my life.With more education comes more opportunity.

    On Evia's PAB: I totally get what Evia means by PAB.IMHO she's laid it out there and made it all very clear.I never take her as a self hater.EVER.But I really do feel that outsiders come reading a blog for the first time can be confused by what she is saying.Plus people have the tendency to project their issues onto others so all of a sudden something that was meant for good can turn around and bite a person in
    the butt.

    Questlove: typical DBR.I remember when he taunted poor Mashonda via twitter.They are all in it together. This includes Phonte,Talib Kweli Mos Def,Common,Blu,etc.Wolves in sheeps clothing.Don't get it twisted! Sooner or later the DBRness always shows, it's only a matter of time.

    Black women really do need to start being the blessing in their own lives.We need to use like 100% of all of our personal resources and energies to build ourselves up.I will continue in my efforts to uplift myself and other black women and girls in the ways that I can.
    I have been going back and forth on what my next post will be.I'm not certain right now because there is so much I want to write about, but I am working on it.

    Thank you Faith,Evia,Khadija Nassif,Blackseagoat,Gina McCauley and many others for inspiring me to aim higher and to write my own blog.

  • E in CT

    Hey Faith and readers. It was me who wrote about my discomfort w Patton and others. Anyone who knows me knows that I have been on the fence about bio children for a long time and of COURSE I have pondered the issue of children and racial identity. At 28, I could have babies galore by this time, if I wanted to. It's certainly not something I declared simply in response to our discussion. Here's my question, and the issue that drives my discomfort, for you seem to think it's just about my wanting to claim just special race privilege status for my own kids. I don't think we are on opposite sides of the fence with this. If Cassie, Solange and Ms. Ebanks all declared themselves simply black, would the Carol's Daughter ad be ok then, even though it still clearly only displays one type of black womanhood?

  • Great post in summarizing the situation with Ashley Judd, et al. The strategies and manipulations are fascinating. You zeroed in on how someone like her would want to continue retaining her specific type of advantage: pale skin. I saw her one quote about rap(e) music, but it never led me to see her as any kind of ally, even before the backtracking.

    Some black women can get too excited when certain people, who really don't care and never cared before, accidentally include us in their self-promoting agenda. In the end, it looks like we're chasing them to remember we exist. We don't have time for that, and it is not necessary.

    We have power. Yet we give it up too easily for something less.

  • a121

    In reference to the two bg fighting in Burger King…SHAMEFUL BEHAVIOR.

    That type of behavior makes us all look bad. The young bm stood by, the manager could have done more, he could have put the victim in his office or restroom and guarded the door until the police arrived. He and his staff should be fired for being dumb. Yes, I realize that BK staff is probably used to that type of behavior.
    A couple of deejays was on the radio this morning continuously talking about those particular bg and they were not complimentary. This is so bad because all or most bw will be painted with the same brush. LOL, this is why some of us want to be a PAB…just saying. It is embrassing.

  • Excellent post as always!

    I don't really know what to think of the 'PAB' thing. Every woman chooses how they will self-identify and hopefully that choice benefits them.

    Are you exercising yours and thinking in terms of building generational dominance for your family and positioning yourself to build one if not? We are so on the verge of a major breakthrough that will be a tide that lifts many black women out of cesspools. Let’s keep moving forward.

    Questions like that are always in the back of my mind. They help me stay focused and make the right choices right now that will yield great rewards in the future.

    As for the major breakthrough, after saw the link to the trailer of The Help on the For Black Women-What not to buy FB, I definitely believe that the BWE has been getting out! I laugh at and pity the people who make these obvious attempts to other us by putting us in these demeaning roles. If they weren't threatened, they wouldn't have to work so hard to not hire any of the attractive bw actresses. If they weren't threatened, they wouldn't constantly put them in these mammy roles. But, I don't want the Gabrielle Unions or Nia Longs to keep complaining about the lack of roles avaliable to them. Long ago they should have collaborated with other black actresses to create their own institutions just as (DBR) Tyler Perry has done.

    Anyways, I look forward to your Blogging 101 post. Any tips are welcome :)

  • MesaATLien

    I love the title. 😉

    I can't be around negativity and self-loathing. This whole situation is basically Slavery 2.0. No matter how much I LOATHE the deplorable things some African Americans do, I have never once thought to renounce who I am because fortunately I know of a history that shows African Americans as people who wanted to be better and had some common sense. It's just a shame that most of us don't truly focus ourselves on the positive instead on wallowing in the negative.

  • Squarlymade

    Part 4

    Such as what happened on “The View” When Sherri and Whoppi ( on 4/14/2011 episode) were talking about air traffic controllers watching movies and falling asleep-they decided to take their anger-energy out on bw (because they couldn’t talk about other men or women) by saying things like ‘I can have a Tamika up there’ I can have a Mary Lou Elis, I can’t have a Shaquanda (or other bw type names that they were coming up with) Of course the audience laughed a great big belly laugh. Mind you Shaquanda didn’t name herself –no one does. These women (who were not air traffic controllers) have just as much possibility and capability to do what another person can do. But that SLAM on them WILL make it so people are justified in limiting them and oppressing their efforts. This was a very vicious racial-misogynistic attack on AAwomen. Can you imagine them being able to say this about ww or a bm-NO! These ww just looooved to hear this being said. They know it’s one more door open for them, and several less for us.

  • Sharifa

    Hi Faith, Really enjoyed your post. I'm glad to know that with the Sojourner's Passport ending (sniff) you're another voice in support of both BWE AND AA ethnic pride. I have plans to start up a blog, but I'm not sure about the timeline. Thanks for your example.

  • Squarlymade

    Part 5
    Let me just elaborate on “Shaquanda” (incase some of you want to pounce) imagine a young black woman living where DBR’s lurk, jumping all the hurtles as a young girl, moving on in education and then looking to take her first job when the door SLAMS because of the false label given to “Shaquanda”.

  • Squarlymade

    part 4
    Such as what happened on “The View” When Sherri and Whoppi ( on 4/14/2011 episode) were talking about air traffic controllers watching movies and falling asleep-they decided to take their anger-energy out on bw (because they couldn’t talk about other men or women) by saying things like ‘I can have a Tamika up there’ I can have a Mary Lou Elis, I can’t have a Shaquanda (or other bw type names that they were coming up with) Of course the audience laughed a great big belly laugh. Mind you Shaquanda didn’t name herself –no one does. These women (who were not air traffic controllers) have just as much possibility and capability to do what another person can do. But that SLAM on them WILL make it so people are justified in limiting them and oppressing their efforts. This was a very vicious racial-misogynistic attack on AAwomen. Can you imagine them being able to say this about ww or a bm-NO! These ww just looooved to hear this being said. They know it’s one more door open for them, and several less for us.

  • Squarlymade

    Part 3
    The problem with “passing as black” is that is doesn’t just exist in a vacuum. You can define yourself as PAB, but then you also have to define “black” (this is where the door gets slammed). When you start saying that black is all the negative and new mess (not going to put the energy into what all…that mess is), and when people start saying things like “n%ggervile”-(let me just tell you Some of you know grow up around and studied black people, well I know, grew-up around and studied white people. I can say they do NOT make distinctions (at first glance) about a person’s character when assigning the n-word. They look at skin shade and facial features. I see some black people talk and act totally different around white people, and I just think ‘wow-you have no idea who this person is’ They got every issue and MORE they just have good recovery efforts) It gives Prejudice whites all the more fuel to just barrage bw. OR even other black women to barrage black women so that ww can have a good laugh and they can be paid.

  • Squarlymade

    Part 2
    “Replicants must be terminated….”
    [Speaking of bw who don’t want to ethnically be perceived as black]They weaken the fabric. There is nothing worse then someone on the inside complaining and not wanting to be there. That sends a very clear signal to others. We do best to distance ourselves from them as much as possible. Perhaps then they are seen as just white women trying to pass as and get as close to (the authentic)black woman…

    Now regarding the PAS idea as Evia blogs about. I get it. I get wanting to say I’m not that(previously what has been understood about black women) I’m this (look-up and notice ME). However what I don’t like about it is that is seems to slam the door in the faces of other AAwomen. I’m not saying that you should hold the door open for them, but give them time to grab it for themselves so it doesn’t slam on them and possibly maim a limb.

  • Squarlymade

    Part 1

    Brovo Faith!
    You said
    “Everyone has benefited from the labor, intellect and resources of the AA woman.”

    As soon as AA women start to realize and understand we are not the zygote of black men and white women-We will stop helping to advance their (bm and ww) causes thinking that we are covering ourselves as well(We are not!) The only way to cover ourselves is to purposefully apply effective fervent energy towards our own causes as black women. Once we roll back all the energy, time, money, intellect and resources of various sorts that we have poured into these other non-bw causes and begin to apply them for ourselves-We are going to see some MAJOR shifts being made, like we already are. Money isn’t the only object-it’s the value that is placed on people, the purpose and the role that they are made to play. Weather you are a billion dollar paid mammy or making nothing at all( anything in-between) the point is STOP BEING A MAMMY.

  • ann

    Great blogging.

    I remember Oprah commenting one day about her being a FREE WOMAN. YES, WE ARE. It is OK to make choices that benefit YOU and your child(ren), ignore any guilt feelings.

  • GoddessM

    Great post and I think this is a great start to a conversation that needs to be had within the BWE community. If you want to have bio kids with your NB beau how do you teach race to your children, daughters especially? Is what they consider themselves a choice?

    Btw. Glad you mentioned the Cherokee Freedman controversy, I wrote an article for it on a another site. The worst part of it is how much it is ignored by the mainstream media.

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