My Black Woman’s Empowerment Message For the Venters, Naysayers & Flat Earth Theorists

Enough already! 

Lately some of the more seemingly mundane posts (refreshers on previous conversations) I’ve published have generated a lot of attention – and opposition. Oh a few malcontents may have gotten through but you haven’t seen the unapproved comments that I will not remotely entertain. It’s been interesting to say the least. I’ve also noticed I’m getting new readers and some first-time commenters. Thanks! I always want to be striving to reach a wider audience and my most recent stats prove that. Again, thanks! This isn’t about me, it’s about YOU out there in the blogosphere trying to find your way through a sea of trash to clean waters and safer shores. To free your mind, follow your bliss and live well. 

2011 is here more or less. What type of year are you planning for yourself or will you allow circumstances to dictate your response? It’s time to step our game up mentally to prepare for an amazing year. It’s available to you if you want it badly enough and are willing to position yourself for it. We may stumble (a lot) but we can get back up. For those already secure a little guidance might be very beneficial if you feel so inclined to share. For those of us out of the Matrix: we must press on toward our goals or give up and let the moss grow over us. It’s DO or DIE. 

Just as women of different ages (who may also be enjoying a wedded bliss) might have greater appeal within their peer group those of us who are unmarried and child-free also offer a certain perspective to the empowerment message. I’m not suggesting there is one message that fits all scenarios of an individual woman’s life either. As always this is a case of making considerations about what has appeal and meaning for you. Those of us still getting to our destinations have specific insights that other may relate to well.  Whatever our individual journey may look like there are fundamental basics we generally agree on regarding moving past any placement of physical and mental limitations on the lives of black women. It’s the combined messaging from all angles that fit into a larger puzzle to offer a clear view. 

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Post-Turkey Coma Linkshare

Whether you had too much food, too much family drama, no family drama, had to work, am looking for work, are tired or wired here’s some of the blogs you might find useful. Go ahead and click on my Blog Roll page for more blogosphere antics! Enjoy your weekend!

Holiday Reflection: Giving Thanks

When times are good we sigh relief and bask in our good fortune.

When times are not as pleasant we may curse the moon.

Just bear in mind it’s all shifting and if we continue to evolve

We’ll get to where we need to be.

So be grateful for even the littlest of things as they are our oxygen to breathe.

Are Black Women Still Blowing Their Dating Chances With White Men?

Don’t run screaming away in terror – or anger. It’s a valid inquiry. The same question could be asked about all non-black males, but for many black women born in the United States who’ve been influenced by limiting views (often double-standards in comparison to the males) within their homes and communities there seems to be extra confusion, questions and angst about potential couplings with WHITE MEN.


At the Dating While Brown site, Interracial Dating Coach Jeremy Nelson was taking reader questions from black women concerned about the mating dance between black women and white men.

It’s like the Wham song “Careless Whisper” but worse!

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The Good Wife: Character Throw-Downs, Season 2 Whiplash & Why We Need A Few Real-Life Wendy Scott Carrs

This is Part Two of my analysis of The Good Wife. I’ll quickly do a character list and why I find them so interesting and are  integral to the overall storylines. I’ll highlight the segue from Season One to Two and how pleasantly surprised I am by the addition of certain characters who’ve become key players on the show.


As a sidebar none of this would matter if the show hadn’t been experiencing an uptick in viewers. SO far The Good Wife has won its timeslot and key demographics and they’re not quite one third into the season. It’s Novembers Sweeps and they’re killing it. I know why: Wendy Scott-Carr, but I’ll discuss the addition of my new Shero (besides Kalinda of course) further into the post to maintain some continuity.

Season One was so good I of course wondered what direction Season Two would go in. It’s moved in an entirely different direction without abandoning its core characters or betraying the audience. Yes, we’re all waiting to find out when Alicia and Will get together. I’m stating it as a forgone conclusion because I think the audience wants the payoff. The writers are just not going to give it to us yet and it may not happen the  way we want.

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Mastering The Tenets of NaNoWriMo

Gaga says, “Just Dance.” Nike says, “Just Do It.” Faith says, “Write (or whatever your creative practice is)!” I wasn’t sure I would participate in National Novel Writing Month again but since I’ve just written a commercial fiction novel in two weeks I think I should.

Technically, I started on October 28 at around 3am when I woke with a nagging urge to write something down. It was more of a journal entry about something that was bothering me but the idea gave me the incentive to write a story about a young woman’s journey from her teens to her early 40’s. I’ve been waking up between 3-5am with words wanting to come out that I’ve had to respond to so here I am.

While I agree it’s not good to rely on inspiration instead of discipline I found myself more as a conduit to writing this story than having to come up with plot points and character development. NaNoWriMo is simply about writing. The editing and cleanup process happens afterwards.

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BBC Show “You Are What You Eat” Offers An Unflinching Look At Our Food Choices

I was going to end the post title with “what makes us fat” but the series is already so un-PC I’m trying to brace the reading audience. The series which is hosted by holistic nutritionist Gillian McKeith takes a look at the habits and motivations of everyday people who need  a wake up call to change their lives. At least by the time McKeith approaches them they’ve been primed, screened and ready to begin her regime.

The series typically peeks into the lives of an individual and their relationships. They then do a weekly breakdown of what the person normally eats (sometimes spreading it all on the table for added effect) and Gillian gives them a new food plan (also spread out so they can sample it) and exercise regime which they are to follow without substitution.

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“The Good Wife” Is Not Only Smart TV But Offers Women Many Valuable Lessons In Love & Life


In case you are otherwise occupied I highly recommend that you amend your schedule to include the CBS drama “The Good Wife”. If you can’t watch it during the scheduled broadcast time Tuesdays at 10pm it’s available at the network’s official site to view online (great use of your commuting time).

The Executive Producers of the show are husband and wife duo Michelle & Robert King who are also the Showrunners and it’s one of the few scripted television series left in the wake of “reality” tv – and it’s GOOD! I am pleasantly surprised when week to week the writers surprise the viewing audience as they progressively challenge us with their multi-layered scripts.

The show is built around the premise of the stand-by-her-man wife of  State’s Attorney General Peter Florrick (he was supposed to be modeled after Eliot Spitzer or really any male politician  [John Edwards, etc]) who got caught in a sex scandal and is sent to prison. He’s trying to clear his name from being charged with corruption as he contends he was only cheating on his wife not the State. His political rival who currently holds his former job is trying to keep him in prison while his wife Alicia is trying to hold the family together and get along with her mother-in-law. Oh and she also squares off against her husband’s rival a few times which makes for some interesting episodes. 

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Call for Links, Shout-Outs & Love To Each Other

Hello AOFB viewing audience. I was serious when I wrote that we need to help our Sistas out for a change. We need to step it up and be more proactive in garnering support for each as it’s looking to be open season on everyone with a shred of common sense and decency who isn’t protected by someone with a proverbial big stick.

Since we regularly go to bat for everyone else but ourselves it’s time to change that mindset. Let me know what projects you can share, if you need help with something and can exchange resources, who’s hyping us that hardly anyone else knows about, etc.

We need to get in the habit of being each other cheerleaders for the positive and affirming. Plus the holidays are coming up and we need to spread the cheer. It starts today! Email me at and I’ll start compiling lists to post next week. Thanks!!